Talking about issues that affect our relationship decisions is very important

OneLove Kwasila, the OneLove campaign in Zambia, recently asked online readers to discuss the role of poverty in pushing people to have multiple concurrent partnerships.

Here is what some of you had to say:

Poverty is not an MCP driver

“Poverty doesn’t promote promiscuity. It’s just the mind of an individual,” says Samuel K. Mvula. Kantu Jane Malaila says “No, I do not agree that poverty is the contributing factor to one having multiple partners. It is selfishness and lust of individuals.”

“Having multiple partners has got nothing to do with poverty. They are just foolish that’s all,” says Mwiche Simwanza. Kelvin Ken Sakala adds that people also have multiple concurrent partners because they are being selfish.

“Poverty has very little to do with one having multiple sexual partners! If one is immoral, they will engage in promiscuity even if they were rich, comfortable or poor. They are ways of dealing with poverty without necessarily being promiscuous. I think people have multiple sexual partners because of they think anatomically women are different and they hope and wish to find a woman with all they need in a woman, which is impossible,” adds Kazuma Seke.

Chewe Kaluba argues that even in wealthy Western countries, where there is little poverty due to social security provisions, people still engage in multiple concurrent partnerships. This proves that “flirtations and adulterous affairs are part of the human mind.”

Diana Mwenya agrees with Chewe Kaluba. “I have lived in the States [USA] for over 13 years, and very poor people get a weekly social security pay check and they get food stamps and have a lot more programs to help them out, yet some of them still go around and have multiple partners and often don’t even know who fathered their children,” says

Carol Gelo Wachi Mwela sees it as greed, rather than necessity. “Most its just greed and living beyond your means. So to supplement for your lavish life, you tend to have multiple partners.”

Some do it for fun

There were those readers, however, who felt that while poverty may be a small contributing factor, the majority of people having multiple concurrent partners do it for fun. “I know a lot of ladies who earn good salaries who just do this for the heck of it,” one reader says.

However, Bonyolo State Council argues that only people who are immature and irresponsible would enter into multiple concurrent partnerships just for the fun of it.

“People enter into such relationships either hoping for marriage or for a living, so its true poverty has very much contributed.”
Kashimu Phillip says ” I think there is no one gold standard reason as to why people have multiple partners, a lot of different factors can be elicited as reasons from different people if one had to carry out a survey.”

OneLove has conducted research into multiple concurrent partnerships in 10 Southern African countries. Download the report.

Multiple Concurrent Partnership ( A 10-country report)

Yes, poverty is a big contributor

Then there were readers who felt that poverty is a big contributor for many people’s decision to have multiple concurrent partners. “A girl who has multiple partners keeps them for financial reasons. One of them could pay her school fees, another takes care of her wardrobe, one other could just be for events and general entertainment(girls like to be proud of a guy that them out), another could be specifically for pocket money and she could have another one who she officially tags boyfriend,” says Anietie Idim.

Nino Simalabbe says sometimes, the material benefits that one gets from concurrent partners are a necessity, rather than doing it to get luxuries in life.
“My friend’s parents both died and her boyfriend is the one that pays for her college tuition. She has three young siblings to look after and none of her relative lend a hand. So she has two men that support her. It’s a hard life sometimes and the thing is how can she manage without them?”

Owen Ngoma says poverty as an MCP driver is so obvious it’s ridiculous to even debate the issue. “Are you telling me that prostitutes do it for fun? With all the risks that come from such relationships? Come it’s poverty that forces them into such relationship. Period!”

We all have a role to play

Accepting that poverty is pushing people into having multiple concurrent partnerships is only the beginning, some of the readers said. We also need to take action to create an enabling environment where poor people / people who have limited resources have some choices on how they can improve their lives without putting themselves at risk of HIV by being in multiple concurrent partnerships.

“Society has also contributed to the issue of having multiple partners in the case of men. It communicates that it is OK for a man to have more than one sexual partner and women get angry and decide to pay back their men by also having multiple partners, which compounds the issue,” Brenda Mwanja Musa. This needs to stop, in order to make it less attractive to have multiple concurrent partnerships.

We also need to empower those community members who are more vulnerable, so that they are more able to refuse having multiple concurrent partnerships.

“Poverty makes someone weaker, vulnerable and easy to manipulate. A man who has more income but is focused or disciplined ends marrying the whole village,” says Chris Zumani Zimba. “Poor women just can’t say no as he has something they need for their survival. Most prostitutes are out there not that they love sex or multiple men, but that they need money in order to see tomorrow.”

Individuals also have a role to play.” It is up to all of us to make healthier relationship choices, even in the midst of poverty,” says Phumlani Mthembu.

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