As the discusion continues on whether you would want to know if your partner is cheating on you, let’s also look at what you can do if you found out that actually, your partner is cheating on you.

Reader Kate Sello says: “kick him off the kerb!” Or to be more blunt, “dump him!” And you may very well come to the decision to end the relationship. But before you make any major decisions (including shaving her head with  No Hair while she sleeps), what do you need to consider?

1. Think hard about what his/her concurrent relationhip with someone means to you and any children you may have. Do not keep the fact that you know to yourself, hoping the relationship will go away.
2. Talk about it with you partner to find some resolution as to why he/she is cheating on you. This will help you to decide whether to dump him/her, or to try to save the relationship.
3. Discuss the consequences of the concurrent relationship on the relationship between the two of you. For example, in addition to the hurt and anger that you may feel, you also need to consider the rik to HIV infection that the concurrent relationship brings.
4. Ask your partner to take an HIV test. You should also take the test.
5. Protect yourself - Ask your partner to use a condom until you are certain that neither of you have HIV.
6. Talk to a friend or someone who you trust to provide you with moral support and advice. Do not feel ashamed.
7. You can also ask your church pastor or marriage counsellor for advice.
8. Help your partner to undertand that his/her relationship could brought the rik to HIV into your home, which would affect not only you and him, but also your children.